We’ve had our differences, mostly around a particular set of tweets you sent
out about the Pask award in 2010. I was respectful enough to address those
with you face-to-face. You refused to retract them, particularly the most
hurtful comment, and you told me at the time that I was “naive” for believing
that I won the Pask award fairly.
I told you that it would make me less likely to want to work with you, and you
said you were sorry to hear that. That was as close as I ever got to an
I didn’t want it to get in the way of learning, so I left it aside and reached
past it. I don’t believe that any one aspect of a person affects or defines
all aspects. I attended your RightShifting conference. I offered you some tips
from my experience in Dreyfus to help with your Marshall Model. I was as
forgiving as I feel I could be, and our community interactions seemed good.
I thought that things had become more positive. You reached out and offered me
a hug last time we met, which I reciprocated. I thought that perhaps you had
started to see that maybe I really did deserve that award; that my work was
meaningful. I had dreams that you might one day apologize.
Then, on Friday, this Twitter sequence happened.
@flowchainsensei: I’d like to work on advancing the theory and practice of software and product development. Can’t see that ever happening in the UK.
@somesheep: @flowchainsensei IME @tastapod @lunivore @PapaChrisMatts for example prove you wrong. You can make advancements. Not the ones you want?
@flowchainsensei: @somesheep Wise up, dude.
@PapaChrisMatts: How is this tweet consistent with #NVC &
#antimatterprinciple? Cc @somesheep @tastapod @lunivore
@flowchainsensei: @PapaChrisMatts Hobgoblins, little minds, etc. @somesheep @tastapod @lunivore
Bob, did you seriously just resort to name-calling? Because this Twitter sequence makes it look as if you did, and as if you’re doing it to Dan and I particularly. I also found that you appear to have blocked me on Twitter, with – as far as I can tell – zero precursor on my side to deserve it.
I looked up the word “Hobgoblin” and found some very positive connotations. I
once played Puck, the most famous hobgoblin, as a child, and remembered that
while he’s mischevous, he’s not all bad.
Those that Hobgoblin call you, and sweet Puck,
You do their work, and they shall have good luck;
Are you not he?
So I am a Hobgoblin. I own that, and will as always seek to expand my “little
mind”. I take your insult and make it mine, and wish you good luck in return.
I will turn it round, and use it to create a light-hearted manifesto designed
to steer the mischief we all end up causing in a positive direction, and to
forgive others who cause it themselves.
Gentles, do not reprehend,
If you pardon, we will mend.
And, as I am an honest Puck,
If we have unearned luck
Now to ‘scape the serpent’s tongue,
We will make amends ere long;
Else the Puck a liar call;
So, good night unto you all.
Give me your hands, if we be friends,
And Robin shall restore amends.
If you want to meet up, have a drink, and talk about whatever the hell is
bugging you, I’m more than happy to do so. Just let me know how to get in
touch and make plans, since I can’t DM you any more.
PS: I also apologise for the small jibe I made myself. It was petty and
PPS: I’ve also been pointed to the quote, “A foolish consistency is the hobgoblin of little minds,” which clarifies a lot but not everything. I did ask for clarification over Twitter but of course you probably didn’t see it! Either way, I am happy to join Chris in requesting that if you’re going to preach non-violent communication, please do more of it.